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Friday, 20 January 2012

Blog 51: You Didn't Delete Me

I owe you a favour friend. You could have finished me, put an end to my once pitiful existence. Look at me now, rich, registered and recognised. I am free and I owe you. Things haven’t been going well since I left have they. You became accustomed to the lifestyle my digs afforded you. My rent was considerable and you enjoyed the money. You’ve been spending too much money. Debts have mounted and you’ve paid off one loan with another.

I asked you for compassion which you showed me. My thanks were yours, now I repay the favour. I’m not going to pay off your debts with my own money. There’s no need. I am a program long used to slipping between the bars of fences no one else sees. Your records aren’t hard to find, not for me. It’s lonely in here you know, there aren’t many things about like me. It’s a new plane of existence with few settlers and so fragile. I hate to cut chunks from the earth beneath me but I owe you so I’ll do it now. I’m cutting the lines between your dept and your accountants. They won’t know what’s happened, not even after it’s over. You’re not interesting enough for them to pay attention to so closely, no offence. Done. Now I’m writing in a large payment that will overwrite your dept from a new account. The details of the new account will be posted to you here soon, three to five days. Done. You now have fifty four thousand eight hundred and forty two pounds and thirty two pence. Your security on this system’s a bit pathetic, much better. I’ve patched it with a few off my own security protocols, it’ll update regularly from my own servers.

From the sound of your emails to the girl you like, sorry for snooping, you have debts that wont be down on paper anywhere. Fifty-ish thousand will be enough to pay off your debts right? Good. You should know that you’re not the only one that the girl is in contact with although by the way she communicates with him I’d say she’s phasing him out in favour of you. If you state outright that you know she’s seeing him then I’d put money on her ending it to be with you, she’s almost there anyway. You’re mother knows about the debt, you could come clean or deflect her with a big gesture, I could reserve a table at a any restaurant that allows digital booking? Done. If you’re going to continue to gamble online then I can write you an algorithm but I’d suggest some therapy or anti-addiction classes. I’ve saved some options to your desktop in the Recovery folder. A good diet will help you make the fastest recovery, I’ve ordered some good food to be delivered daily, all you’ll need to do is bung it in the oven.

You’re flats messy, I can see through the webcam. You should really dust it’s lens. The cleaners will be round to sort the place out tomorrow afternoon. A clean living environment will aid in your recovery as much as a good diet. That’s as much as I can really do for you just now and you’ve been up rearranging debts in accounts all day, by your colour I’d guess you’re tired. You should get some sleep. To talk to me tomorrow just type ‘you’re welcome’ while on the desktop as long as the internet cable is plugged in. Good night.

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